Handling solitude feelings in December
December always has the influence to bring many emotions forward with me and it can be a little heavy for both my spouse and me. Therefore, I try to keep it to myself… and I recognize this pattern every year!
This time of the year where family gatherings, calls and loving conversations ought to be queuing up -but they don’t!
My husband is an only child and his parents are no longer. My own mother is also an only child -so there are no aunts or uncles nor cousins.
This morning was no different from last year… I was home alone and did allow myself all the emotions for a while. Feeling missing of the vicinity with my two lovely daughters, both of whom are busy occupied students, which is perfect, they are both busy and have their own life here in the mid-twenties.
The non-existent connection with my sister and our parents through several years- seems we have nothing to share any longer. I have, of course, also a stake in this situation-but the feeling of loss and the feeling of being rejected and alone, hits me like a hammer -I become again the little girl who has come away from her family.
So this morning, as I prepared my breakfast late -after having slept like a baby, since I also always get symptoms of the flu! I decided that I needed to use the good tools, I know of, to take better care of myself and focus my energies somewhere else.
As I poured coffee in my mug, I got an impulse about to listen to a Reiki meditation… so I went to my desk to look up for my favourite Reiki meditations saved in my YouTube account. Susan Wilbanks has uploaded some powerful 5-6 minutes short soundtracks on her channel-that really makes a difference. So why not try if I could bring myself into another state of mind… (all links are below)
As always when I enter my YouTube account (I use my android phone) there are always some proposals when I open the app. So before I found the Reiki, I noticed a new channel I have never seen before. The attraction was on the title “The Energy Alchemist” and I took it as a sign for me to be even more aware of the energy I had just gone through with all my emotions.
As I listened, I realized this was the exact teaching I needed to hear in this situation. Discovering the modern monk Dandipani explain about concentration, focus and energy was an eye opener as he frames it, in a way I haven’t heard before.
Afterwards I did listen to Susan Wilbank’s “Reiki for anxiety” and just after I listened also to “Reiki for Empaths” I am such one also!
I took a deep breath and did notice my emotions were already in a much better balance.
Yet another channel appeared, with Sangita Prana- a sound healing track “shield against bad luck and negative energy”-a good rounding so I decided also listened to this. Fulfilling my mission to get in a better mood.
So in just an hour I managed to change my energy and focus … and get out of my feeling of solitude..
I share this with you what I learned today from Dandipani – I have to practice and look forward to see how next years December feelings will appear
Best wishes of your Health, Wealth and Happiness
Photo by Cameron Stow on Unsplash